Enneagram Type 9: Step 6

Enneagram Type 9: Working Step 6 in Overeaters Anonymous

Step 6: “Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.”

For Type 9s, working Step 6 involves addressing their tendencies to avoid conflict, suppress their desires, and go along with others to maintain peace. They need to become willing to let go of their habit of minimizing their own needs and desires, as well as their tendency to avoid change or difficult feelings. This step is about becoming ready to face and release these patterns to make room for healthier behaviors and a more authentic self.

Here’s a detailed approach for Type 9s to work Step 6:

1. Identify Your Defects of Character

Questions to ask:

  • What specific patterns of avoidance, complacency, or minimizing my own needs have I recognized in my Step 4 inventory?
  • How do my tendencies to go along with others or avoid conflict impact my relationship with food and my self-care practices?
  • What are the core defects that drive my tendency to disengage from my own desires and needs?

Example:

  • You might identify that your habit of avoiding conflict and going along with others has led you to neglect your own needs and desires, affecting your eating habits and overall well-being.

2. Reflect on the Impact of These Defects

Steps to take:

  • Assess the Consequences: Reflect on how your patterns of avoidance and complacency have impacted your eating habits, relationships, and overall well-being. How have these defects hindered your recovery?
  • Acknowledge Harm: Recognize the harm these patterns have caused to yourself and others. Consider how your tendency to suppress your own needs and desires has affected your relationships and self-care.

Example:

  • Reflect on how your avoidance of conflict and tendency to go along with others has led to unhealthy eating patterns as a way of coping with suppressed feelings or unmet needs.

3. Evaluate Your Willingness to Change

Steps to take:

  • Determine Readiness: Assess your willingness to let go of these defects. Are you prepared to face the discomfort of acknowledging and expressing your own needs and desires?
  • Explore Fears: Identify any fears or anxieties about confronting conflict or asserting your own needs. What concerns do you have about making these changes?

Example:

  • You may feel apprehensive about expressing your own needs and desires, worried that doing so might lead to conflict or disrupt your sense of inner peace.

4. Seek Support and Guidance

Steps to take:

  • Consult with a Sponsor or Mentor: Discuss your readiness to work on these defects with a sponsor or trusted advisor. Seek their support and guidance on how to manage your fears and stay committed to the process.
  • Use Reflective Practices: Engage in practices such as journaling, meditation, or prayer to deepen your understanding of your willingness to change and to seek guidance from a higher power.

Example:

  • Share your concerns about facing conflict and asserting your needs with your sponsor and ask for their advice on managing these fears while developing trust in the recovery process.

5. Develop an Action Plan

Steps to take:

  • Set Specific Goals: Establish actionable goals for addressing your defects. This might include practicing assertiveness, being more mindful of your own needs, and confronting conflict in a healthy manner.
  • Create a Plan: Outline steps to implement these goals, such as setting boundaries, learning to express your needs clearly, and seeking support when needed.

Example:

  • Set a goal to practice assertiveness by speaking up about your needs in a calm and respectful manner. Develop a plan to address conflict when it arises, using strategies that help you stay centered and focused on your own well-being.

6. Practice Self-Acceptance and Mindfulness

Steps to take:

  • Embrace Self-Acceptance: Work on accepting your own needs and desires as valid and important. Recognize that addressing these aspects of yourself is a crucial part of your recovery.
  • Cultivate Mindfulness: Practice mindfulness to stay connected with your own feelings and needs. Use mindfulness techniques to help you stay present and aware of your desires and boundaries.

Example:

  • Develop affirmations to reinforce your self-worth and the importance of honoring your own needs. Practice mindfulness exercises to stay attuned to your feelings and desires, helping you to express them more clearly and confidently.

Summary

For Type 9s, working Step 6 involves recognizing and becoming willing to release defects related to avoidance, complacency, and the suppression of their own needs and desires. This step requires Type 9s to reflect on the impact of these patterns, assess their readiness for change, seek support, and develop a practical plan for addressing their tendencies. By embracing self-acceptance and practicing mindfulness, Type 9s can work towards overcoming their avoidance and fostering a more authentic approach to their recovery journey.