Enneagram Type 8: Working Step 6 in Overeaters Anonymous
Step 6: “Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.”
For Type 8s, working Step 6 involves addressing their tendencies toward control, intensity, and self-reliance. Type 8s may struggle with relinquishing their need to be in control or their fear of vulnerability. This step is about becoming willing to let go of these defects and trust in a higher power or the recovery process.
Here’s a detailed approach for Type 8s to work Step 6:
1. Identify Your Defects of Character
Questions to ask:
- What specific behaviors or patterns have I identified in my Step 4 inventory that relate to my need for control or resistance to vulnerability?
- How do my tendencies to dominate or control impact my relationship with food and my self-care practices?
- What are the core defects driving my need to assert dominance or avoid showing weakness?
Example:
- You might identify that your need to control situations and avoid showing vulnerability has led you to overeat as a way to assert power or avoid dealing with your emotions.
2. Reflect on the Impact of These Defects
Steps to take:
- Assess the Consequences: Consider how your need for control and resistance to vulnerability have impacted your eating habits, relationships, and overall well-being. How have these defects hindered your recovery?
- Acknowledge Harm: Recognize the harm caused to yourself and others due to these patterns. Reflect on how your intensity and control issues have affected your relationships and self-care.
Example:
- Reflect on how your need to dominate and control has led to conflict in relationships and has contributed to unhealthy eating patterns as a means of exerting power or control.
3. Evaluate Your Willingness to Change
Steps to take:
- Determine Readiness: Assess your willingness to let go of these defects. Are you prepared to face the discomfort of relinquishing control and showing vulnerability?
- Explore Fears: Identify any fears or anxieties about giving up your need for control. What concerns do you have about allowing yourself to be vulnerable or dependent on others?
Example:
- You may feel apprehensive about losing your sense of control and worry that showing vulnerability might make you appear weak or powerless.
4. Seek Support and Guidance
Steps to take:
- Consult with a Sponsor or Mentor: Discuss your readiness to work on these defects with a sponsor or trusted advisor. Seek their support and guidance on how to manage your fears and stay committed to the process.
- Use Reflective Practices: Engage in practices such as journaling, meditation, or prayer to deepen your understanding of your willingness to change and to seek guidance from a higher power.
Example:
- Share your concerns about letting go of control with your sponsor and ask for their advice on managing these fears while developing trust in the recovery process.
5. Develop an Action Plan
Steps to take:
- Set Specific Goals: Establish actionable goals for addressing your defects. This might include practicing letting go of control in certain areas, being more open to vulnerability, and developing healthier ways to manage your intensity.
- Create a Plan: Outline steps to implement these goals, such as finding ways to delegate responsibilities, learning to express your emotions constructively, and seeking support when needed.
Example:
- Set a goal to delegate tasks and responsibilities to others, practice being more open about your feelings, and develop a plan to address your intensity in a healthy manner.
6. Practice Trust and Self-Acceptance
Steps to take:
- Embrace Trust: Work on trusting the process of recovery and your higher power. Acknowledge that letting go of control and embracing vulnerability are essential parts of growth.
- Cultivate Self-Acceptance: Practice self-acceptance by recognizing that vulnerability is a strength, not a weakness. Be compassionate with yourself as you work through these changes.
Example:
- Develop affirmations to reinforce your trust in the recovery process and in your ability to handle vulnerability. Practice self-compassion by acknowledging your efforts and progress, even when it’s challenging.
Summary
For Type 8s, working Step 6 involves recognizing and becoming willing to release defects related to their need for control, intensity, and avoidance of vulnerability. This step requires Type 8s to reflect on the impact of these patterns, assess their readiness for change, seek support, and develop a practical plan for letting go. By embracing trust in the recovery process and practicing self-acceptance, Type 8s can work towards overcoming their control issues and fostering a more balanced approach to their recovery journey.